My First Time at an Islamic Wedding  

Rewind: December 23rd 2023, I had been invited to my boyfriend’s friend’s cousin’s wedding reception – networking at its finest. Thanks to my boyfriend, my little circle at the time consisted of friendly Muslim pals, which meant I was invited to a Muslim wedding reception. However, I was unaware of this invitation – I guess my boyfriend wasn’t up for it and wanted to stay home. But guess what, I’m a girl who simply loves dressing up so, I decided to drag him along for the reception, which meant I had last minute errands to run. 

As a non Muslim (I’m Hindu), my wardrobe is anything but conservative, and from my knowledge, a traditional Muslim woman’s wardrobe is just that. So, I ran around Gateway like a headless chicken – with my boyfriend and his friend trotting everywhere behind me – trying to find something conventional. Oh, I also needed heels, all I had were dirty white Airforces. My budget was small since it was last minute, so that forbade me in terms of variety, (I mean my boyfriend’s budget oops). I searched high and low, racing against the clock until Legit called my name. I found a pearl pink, flare dress with pleats running down the skirt and spaghetti straps. Unfortunately, I had zero luck in finding heels so dirty white Airforces it was. Also, is it just me or do guys make the best shopping pals? Got the dress and headed home to get ready, (did I mention it was 34 degrees?).

The reception was at a hall just beneath the mosque, around 150 guests arrived. I paid attention to their clothing, so I could learn what’s acceptable and not. Most of the Muslim women wore stunning long gowns, covered from shoulder to ankle.  The decor was minimal, which I thought was simply ideal. Soft Arabic music flowed through the hall, you could hear light vocals buried underneath the sound of chit chat. We sat down at a table with my boyfriend’s friend’s family, I was introduced to a warm and friendly bunch. It was time for the groom and bride to enter. The groom – looked dashingly handsome in his navy blue suit. The bride – dressed in a stone black, shimmering abaya with a chiffon scarf covering her hair. She was short, pale, with pink cheeks and red lips, a sight for sore eyes! The formalities included family members, friends and a Mulana who preached graciously. The Muslim guests were expected to partake in certain acts of prayer and I was as lost as that candy floss flavored vape. I had not been entirely educated on Muslim culture and practices so, I felt like a fish out of water, but thankfully, my boyfriend and his friend came to the rescue. As it went on I received little anecdotes explaining every little detail I saw happen in front of me. Sweaty, fatigued and starved, finally it was time to eat! The caterers brought to each table a plate of savory rice, and a separate plate of curried lamb. I’m a tad bit shy, so I consulted my boyfriend as to what the dish was meant to be before I could inhale. The questioning dish in front of me was actually biryani. Why was I confused? I’m used to this dish mixed together. All my life, each time I ate biryani was either in a pot or bowl mixed. This was the first time I’ve seen it served separately, but trust me it served. Eating time is momentous, despite any culture differences at that little table, we all were joined by 1 common thing – food. Shortly after supper was tea time, something I learned is a tradition, but never really experienced (still haven’t experienced, we made a run for it since our social batteries drained out). I love the idea of an intimate and peaceful post celebration, though. 

I’ve learned the differences between Muslim and Tamil weddings. In my culture, a wedding goes on for 3 days whereas Muslim weddings, from what I know, are generally shorter. Tamil wedding guest attire usually includes sarees, lehengas etc, this isn’t entirely suitable for Muslim weddings since most or some of these dresses reveal skin – the whole purpose of Muslim attire is to be covered. You’d mistake a Tamil wedding for a party, well, if you ask a Tamil they’d say it’s a party. Music is the greatest form of expression, DJs, bands etc are a priority on a Tamil wedding plan. I’ve learned it differs from the Islamic culture, their music is soft and allows people to speak in a graceful manner. At Tamil weddings, guests are served vegetarian meals, usually vegetarian biryani, not my thing. I shall enjoy Muslim weddings for the unrestricting chows. 

I’m glad to have experienced the Islamic wedding culture in its glory. Regardless of religion, culture or race, the whole point of a wedding is to celebrate love, unity and new beginnings. No matter how it’s done, we as guests have to remember that we attended not solely for socializing, food or a good time (maybe a lil bit), but to be a part of a beautiful experience that is matrimony.